All I know is that I'm sad and I miss my mom. I am fighting to not feel forgotten - not by her...but by God. I know that He loves me. I know that He is Good, and Wise, and Generous, and Loving. I know that He cares...that He is faithful...but sometimes getting those connections from my head to my heart....well, I'm a work in progress. But I'm struggling with feeling forgotten by Him. The pastor who preached at church tonight mentioned this verse in a side-story, "Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you." Isaiah 49:15 Right now, my mom remembers me...but our relationship is completely different. Right now, my mom is like every other sinner that has walked the earth...this disease is killing her...and she may forget me one day - not because she wants to...but because her brain and her body are fading away. She may forget me...but I have a perfect, heavenly father, who sent His son Jesus, to die and beat sin and death...and one day...those who love and trust Him will be with Him forever. He has not forgotten me...but loves me...pursues me...wont let me get away from Him - even when I try hard to run away...He won't let me go.
God's feelings for me forever were settled on the cross. He loves me. The cross proves how much He loves me. Now to get all of this from my head completely to my heart...He's working on me.
